12-07-2018 07:35 PM
I’m struggling a bit again. The intensity of emotions are back. I want to curl up and die. I can’t do this anymore. I’m no good to myself or anyone anymore. I’m emotional all the time. I can’t control it. I shake and cry. I am starting to shake now. I am here but not here. I’ve got a headache.
I don’t want to deal with any of my issues anymore @Zoe7. I’m over it. I don’t want it anymore.
12-07-2018 07:38 PM
You have had a really huge day @BlueBay and you often feel like this at this time of night - you are tired and things get to you more when you are tired. Can you have an early night tonight and try to get some much needed rest?
12-07-2018 07:45 PM
Im laying down on the couch. I need to get away. I need to stop my head from being so full of thoughts
Thiughts of running going away
I’m so tired I can’t think
I’m not coping
I hate my sessions it’s hard
think I’ll go to bed
hope you sleep well Zoe
i don’t know what I’m doing
I want to cry
I want to hide away
I need a heavy blanket around me
im not doing well
12-07-2018 07:49 PM
These sessions really do take so much out of you BB - don't be sorry Hon - they are hard, really hard and it is no wonder you feel like you do tonight. I hope you can sleep @BlueBay but come back on if you can't and get the support here you deserve. Will check in with you tomorrow either way Hon - hugs
13-07-2018 07:56 AM - edited 13-07-2018 09:27 AM
I didn’t sleep well last night. Kept tossing and turning. And having weird dreams.
I’m up now slowly getting ready for work. You know if we weren’t so desperate for money I would stay home
I need to calm my mind. It’s everywhere st the moment.
I want to call my doctor and tell him I’m leaving my family for good. I want to tell him that I’m not coping. And tell him that I can’t do this anymore. I’m just not in the right headspace anymore. Now I’m crying.
I really have no idea what I’m doing 😥
13-07-2018 08:29 AM
Just work through today hour by hour @BlueBay - go to work first and get through that then deal with the rest of the day - one thing at a time. You need to keep busy - we know you don't do well when you have too much time to think - so organise some things to do after work - knitting, walking Jersey, making dinner...and then maybe get to Friday Feast and keep occupied there for a while...
13-07-2018 09:31 AM
@Zoe7 I just want to stay home in bed. But I have to go to work. I hate it. I need a break. It feels everything is over powering me. Hour by hour I will try
I’ll chat to you tonight.
I wish I wasn’t going. I just can’t do this anymore.
13-07-2018 09:33 AM
Just gwt through work and then deal with the rest of the day later @BlueBay - you got this Hon - I believe in you
13-07-2018 01:23 PM
@Zoe7 On my lunch break. I want to go away. I can’t cope. I’m struggling with stupid customers who are so impatient. I’m not doing well. I just want to get away. Why can’t i just go.
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